


Shelter in Place

by ephemera (incognitajones)



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pre-Canon, Angst and Porn, Chance Meetings, F/M, First Time, PWP, Pre-Canon, Sexual exploration, trapped together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-30
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2020-09-27 13:53:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20408830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/incognitajones/pseuds/ephemera
Summary: Anyone in the path of one of the deadly duststorms on Gana has to seek shelter until it blows out. Jyn had a safe refuge scoped out in advance, but when a stranger intrudes on it, she has to decide whether to let him share it... and just how far she's prepared to trust him.





	Shelter in Place

**Author's Note:**

> For **Starbird** for two reasons: in hopes that it might cheer her up during a rough time, and because it wouldn't have been started or finished without her interest, encouragement, and cheerleading.
> 
> Many thanks to **firefeufuego** and **TinCanTelephone** for helping me smooth out some of the rough spots; any remaining are on me.
> 
> [CNTW because Jyn's age is left vague, but she's probably not quite eighteen.]

The storm was coming quickly; it was almost upon her. 

Jyn kept moving as fast as she could while trying not to let her limp show too badly. Her left knee burned, already stiffening from the kick she’d taken, but she couldn’t slow down now. She had to keep shoving through the stream of people headed in the opposite direction, away from the spaceport. The last flight took off an hour ago, and she’d just missed it—her karking luck in action.

Jyn didn’t want to be on Gana for a single instant more, now that she finally had the credits she needed to get off it, but she was stuck to its surface for however long it took this harmattan storm to blow out. Nothing could land or take off during one of them. The gritty crystalline sand of this planet was razor-sharp; flung at high speed by the wind, it buffeted ships to the ground and scoured through durasteel. Even protective clothing couldn’t help for long-term exposure, and Jyn’s (stolen) goggles were already scratched and scuffed from exposure to the everyday gusts. 

She didn’t have the money for access to the better meteorological satellites, either, so she didn’t know how long the storm might last. All she had to go on was the information scrolling across the public signage, advising everyone to take shelter for the next ten to twenty standard hours.

She hated this place. If she hadn’t had to find that festering boil Horinn here and pry the kriffing money he owed her out of him, she’d never have set foot on it. She didn’t know if Gana was supposed to have kyber deposits. She’d certainly never heard it spoken of as somewhere strong in the Force, and there were no temples here, no believers on pilgrimage. But the bedrock of the planet seemed to sing, calling to her own chunk of crystal. 

After years of carrying it next to her heart, Jyn was used to the way it could suddenly burn or freeze, flaring into a painful point against her skin for an instant. But here it seemed to vibrate almost undetectably, all the time, like a struck bell that had stopped humming but still held the memory of sound in its shivering atoms.

She didn’t know whether that was good, or bad, or just neutral. There was a lot she didn’t know; she tried not to think about that. Sometimes she wished she could have grown up in a place and time where she could have gotten an actual education. She could have spent time studying living things or solving constructive problems... instead of learning the best way to get through plastoid armour or how many ways to blow up a speeder.

She shook her head sharply and forced those vague thoughts about a different life back down into the hatch they’d escaped from. No point in wasting time and energy on them. What she needed right now was to pay attention, make sure that no-one was following her as she headed down crooked alleys toward the emergency bolthole she’d scouted out as soon as she arrived. 

It was a good one, too: an old light freighter in the scrapyard next to the small cargo spaceport. Everything useful had been stripped out of it, from the lighting cells and engine pods to the sonic plates in the fresher. Nothing was left but an empty shell; but it was an airtight one that would protect her from the storm. And no-one had bothered to pry the bulky waste treatment module out of the corner it was bolted into, so she’d even have a place to relieve herself.

She whipped a thin electrical probe out of the lining of her jacket and with a swift, practiced movement inserted it in the old lockpad on the hatch, jimmying it carefully. The door jerked and bumped open on gritty tracks, sending a wide bar of bronze light into the dusty darkness of the ship.

Jyn didn’t know what warned her that someone else was there; maybe it was just a small counter-current of moving air. But even before the door was fully open she had a hand on the vibroblade in her pocket. A blanket that definitely hadn't been there before was in the corner of the ship. It moved and a person jumped up, wobbling on their feet and catching themself with a hand against the bulkhead. 

Jyn stayed in the hatch opening, where she could keep the option to go in or flee. It was a human, a boy—young man, whatever—not much older than her, and he didn’t look good. Even in the dim light she could see slick sweat gleaming on his forehead, and his arm trembled as he held his other hand up, palm out, despite the fact that he was clearly trying to maintain an ironclad control. 

Was he high, or sick? Jyn tightened her grip on the handle of her knife. He looked weak enough to take without too much effort. But if he was sick, it might be contagious, or he could be feigning weakness to lure her in. 

She decided to see if she could bluff her way through this without a fight. “This place is mine. Get out,” she growled, lowering her voice to the most menacing pitch it would hold and pointing the knife in her hand at the half-open hatch. She needed to be under shelter before the windstorm reached its dangerous peak.

“I can’t,” he said, voice cracking. “I won’t make it anywhere else before the storm hits.” 

“What’s wrong with you?” she demanded. 

He blinked at her, dark eyes glassy and shining. “Just a virus…” He swallowed painfully and straightened with an effort that made him gasp, clenching his hands. “I’m not leaving. If you want this place to yourself, you’re going to have to come over here and kill me. I promise it won’t be easy.”

An interesting approach. On the other hand, he was right. He looked skinny, but wiry and tough; Jyn was willing to bet he’d put up a good fight. He might have a blaster hidden under that baggy jacket… how did she know he wouldn’t kill her where she stood? Or without even meaning to, from whatever sickness he had? 

The wind was rising, and a whirling gust of it flung grit against her back hard enough to sting through her thin jacket. She couldn’t leave and find another hiding place within the next few minutes. She had to make a call now: risk sharing this space with a stranger, or take him on and hope she could drive him out into the storm, if she couldn’t kill him. Or if whatever sickness he had didn't kill both of them.

“Strip,” Jyn said. 

He blinked at her again, and his whole body settled into the frozen stillness she was familiar with in her own bones as the tense precursor to violence.

“Look, I don’t know what's wrong with you and I don’t want to come close enough to find out. So strip. And throw any weapons you’ve got on the floor.” This way, at least she could make sure he was unarmed. 

He sighed, his chin and shoulders sinking in reluctant acceptance. “Fine.” 

Jyn stepped inside the ship and pulled the creaking door shut behind her. The light was much dimmer now, though enough veiled daylight sifted through scratched viewports to show him shrug his jacket off his arms. It fell to the floor and he kicked it toward her. She darted just close enough to drag it over with her foot, crouched down and patted it quickly for weapons: a sheathed knife in the sleeve, nothing more. She stood up, sticking his knife in the waistband of her pants for now. “Keep going.”

He undid the fastenings at the neckline of his shirt and pulled it over his head, revealing a skinny torso with patchy hair around the nipples and a faint trail leading down from his navel. 

“Pants too.” Jyn gestured with her knife and he dropped them to the ground. “All the way. Then turn around.” He sighed and kicked them off so that she could see he wasn’t wearing an ankle holster, and turned in a slow circle. Though she scanned his bare body intently, she didn’t see any rash or spots or weird markings—just a few scars. In fact, he was relatively unscathed compared to the map of past injuries that covered her skin; she felt a twinge of envy.

He shivered and crossed his arms over his torso to hold in warmth. “Do I have to lose the underwear too, or are you satisfied I’m not packing anything else?” 

Jyn raised an eyebrow. Pretty feisty for someone who looked like death. He rolled his eyes as the double meaning of what he’d said struck him and she couldn’t help smirking. “I don’t care about what you’re packing under there,” she retorted. “But I’ll keep the knife.”

“Come on. You’ve got one, I’ve got one,” he argued. “Let’s call it even.”

“Nope.” 

She backed up and sat down with her back against the wall, right beside the hatch release button in case she needed to get out quickly after all, watching him with one hand on the hilt of her knife. He dragged his pants back on and sat on the blanket again, staring straight at her in the muted sepia light. Jyn glanced up at the narrow strip of scratched transparisteel over his head. The light outside was already dying, fading into a dim brown; soon she wouldn’t be able to see him at all. She wondered again if this was a good idea. 

His breath rattled in his throat and he coughed thickly. She unwound the scarf around her neck, then paused. It was nothing special, just a ragged length of fabric, but it was hers. And Jyn knew better than to give up what belonged to her. On the other hand… she sighed, got up and stepped over to the boy’s side cautiously. 

He’d taken his shirt off and balled it up into a pillow: he had to be feverish, because it was already getting colder in here. She dampened the cloth with a few drops shaken out of his canteen—she wasn’t wasting her own water on this—and offered it to him at arms’ length. He swiped at his forehead, his cheeks, the side of his neck while keeping his dark eyes fastened on hers, disturbingly soft and disarming. 

“Water?” She could barely understand him, his voice was croaky and his accent stronger than before. She grabbed his canteen, opened it and passed it to him carefully, watching his shaking hands to make sure he wouldn’t drop it. She looked back at him just in time to catch him suppress a shiver. His forehead was still shiny with sweat, and his dark eyes stood out in a pallid face. He looked worse than before.

“Are you going to puke?” she asked. If so, he could at least do it in the recycler. She didn’t fancy the idea of smelling sour vomit for the next few hours.

He shook his head immediately. It wasn’t entirely convincing, though. “Not that kind of sick,” he said. “No idea what this is. I’ve only been on Gana a day and I had all my shots…”

“What’re you here for?”

He didn’t answer right away, and Jyn wondered at her own nosiness. She hadn’t really expected him to tell her, anyway. "Had to meet someone at Anaxos," he mumbled.

Seriously? He'd shown up at that place alone? Had he never heard of the rep that cantina had? “You were drugged,” she told him bluntly.

“No,” he rejected the possibility as forcefully as Jyn would have. “I was careful, I didn’t eat or drink anything that wasn’t opened in front of me.”

“The smart ones don’t do it that way,” she said dismissively. “Did you use the fresher? A breathing mask maybe?”

A long silence, and then a string of heartfelt curses. Jyn was duly impressed with his vocabulary in several Mid-Rim languages. 

“It’s pretty mild,” she reassured him. “They don’t want to damage the merchandise, after all. You’ll just feel like bantha shit for another hour or so. And it could be way worse. You’re here, instead of in chains on your way to a Hutt’s palace.” She shrugged. “I’d call that lucky.”

“Shavit.” A few more mumbled curses, and then silence again. 

Jyn put his canteen down beside him and returned to the other side of the ship. Her feet were sore, her knee was still throbbing, and the credit chip hidden in the lining of her boots had chafed a spot on her ankle raw. She unlaced her boots and set them beside her, rolling her jacket up into a ball she plunked down on top of them and using the whole bundle as a lumpy pillow.

She wasn't going to sleep, not with a stranger two metres away and the wind whining like a vibroblade trying to cut through the hull of the ship. But she closed her eyes and rested a little. From the small snuffling noises, it sounded like the boy across the hold was sleeping, but that might have been an act. She paid attention to her own breathing, keeping it slow and even and not gasping in shallow gulps that would only bring on a panic attack. Not what she needed when trapped in a small metal box with a stranger who was bigger and probably stronger than her. Though she doubted he was any meaner.

Saw’s paranoia whispered in her ear, telling her to try and sneak up on him now, take him out… but he hadn’t done anything to her. Yet. And he seemed honestly weak and—not precisely helpless, but vulnerable. It didn’t feel right to take advantage of that, though she knew he probably wouldn’t have the same misgivings if their positions were reversed.

Jyn shifted uneasily, pressing her shoulders harder against the cold durasteel at her back. She folded her fingers around her crystal and rubbed her thumb over the words engraved into it, reading them by touch: _Trust the Force._ Jyn no longer trusted the Force—or anything—but the smooth, polished facets of the crystal were still an instinctive comfort.

Rasping noises roused Jyn from a light doze. She jerked her head up, neck cracking, and looked across the ship. The boy hadn’t moved, his body a lump of shadow. Jyn shivered, a full-body shudder that built into uncontrollable shaking. Night and the high winds outside had dropped the temperature much lower. The metal decking was icy underneath her; it would only suck more heat from her body the longer she stayed lying down. She stood up, slowly and silently so that she wouldn’t startle the stranger awake. Shifting from foot to foot to get some blood flowing through the blocks of ice that were her toes, she clamped her teeth together before they started chattering and banged her fists roughly against her thighs, trying to drive some warmth into her flesh. 

“Hey.” Her head snapped up at the soft word. The boy was looking at her, she thought, or at least his dark silhouette was sitting up with his head pointed in her direction. She heard a muffled thump as he patted the blanket spread out beneath him. “We’ll both freeze at this rate unless we share.” 

Jyn squeezed her arms around herself, thinking about the rumpled blanket and craving its warmth. She couldn’t do it. Part of her desperately wanted to... but it was too dangerous. 

He lay down and turned over, presenting his back to her. “Up to you,” he said. “But there’s plenty of room.”

Jyn stared at the line of his back in the dim light. She could kill him right now; it would be simple. Even in the near darkness she knew how to find the groove between his ribs where a single stab would kill him in seconds, more or less painlessly. Was he always this trusting? Highly unlikely, or he’d be dead by now.

Her crystal hummed again, making her breastbone vibrate in sympathy. Jyn wrapped her fingers around it and squeezed her eyes shut in frustration. She didn’t know what that meant, whether it was supposed to be a warning or a sign that she could trust this idiot.

Either way, did it really make a difference? The knife-blade wind was still keening outside. The two of them were stuck here together for maybe another twelve hours. She couldn’t stay awake the whole time—or she could, but she’d be slow and sluggish. And if she fell asleep on her own, she might not wake up, if it got much colder. He didn’t have any weapons left. Maybe it was better to be lying beside him, where presumably she’d wake up faster if he tried anything. 

Jyn sighed. She could justify it however she liked, but it came down to a coin flip. Guess wrong and she’d be dead; but at least one way, she’d die comfortable.

So she set both their knives down beside her boots and her pack, right next to the hatch, where she could grab the whole bundle easily if she had to run for it. Then she sidled closer, poised in readiness for an attack. He didn’t move. She tugged at the corner of the blanket to straighten out the creases and lay down on her side facing the door, with her back pressed against his. That would keep her warm and she’d feel the motion if he tried to get up. 

Heat bled into her flesh from his back and the insulation of the thick blanket between her and the metal deck felt heavenly. Jyn closed her eyes and sighed as her muscles unknotted. Tempting as it was, she couldn’t relax too much. No matter how unthreatening this boy seemed, she didn’t know him and he had no reason to be kind to her. 

But he was warm, so warm, and quiet beside her in the dark. He didn’t move at all. She squeezed and widened her eyes, counted backward from a thousand by sevens, and then started trying to work out a new cypher in her head. Her thoughts kept trailing off into incoherence, lulling her into believing that it would be fine if she dozed, just for a moment... Her breathing evened out, slowing to match his, and Jyn slipped down into a deep dark pool. 

When she woke, it was even darker. She couldn’t see any trace of light through the viewports now; the thickest part of the storm must have rolled in, blanketing the city with clouds of razor-sharp dust. Under her shirt, her crystal was scorching against her skin. Why did she have a blanket under her? Where had that come from?

And there was a warm body beside her. She sat up in a panic before her brain came back online and she remembered who it was: the trespasser, the boy she’d foolishly decided to let stay. Maybe not that foolishly, considering she was unharmed so far. 

He stirred when she rucked up the blanket and she could feel his own muscles lock up in reaction when he woke, before he forced them to relax. Jyn cleared her throat and concentrated on making her breathing slow, even and steady. She hadn’t been about to flail at the darkness in unthinking, instinctive panic—absolutely not. 

She hated being forced to wait here like this, in silence and darkness. She’d never liked having to sit still. She had vague memories of spending hours engrossed in her own head on Lah’mu, but that was when she was outside in the open air; ever since Saw picked her up, she hadn’t been one for enforced stillness. And she didn’t have a lantern in her pack, though it would probably only have burned out and left her worse off... 

“You don’t like the dark.” His voice was sure, knowing, and Jyn didn’t appreciate being read like that.

“So what?” she snapped. Her voice was gravelly from thirst, and the way it cracked sounded far too vulnerable. 

“Hey. It's okay.” A weight on her bicep, warm through the fabric of her sleeve: she nearly jumped out of her skin before she realized it was his hand. It slid down her arm, maintaining an even, steady pressure, until his calloused palm rested on top of her knuckles.

She didn’t someone to hold her karking hand, she wasn’t a _child_—but it helped to have a point of contact in the darkness, knowing that another breathing body was beside her. She stayed alert, waiting for another movement, but all he did was lie still, leaving his hand atop hers. His skin was warm and dry, and gradually Jyn relaxed. 

She laid back down, shifting slightly to escape an annoying lumpy wrinkle in the blanket under her back. Suddenly her thigh was lined up parallel to and nearly touching his, and her shoulder bumped against his arm. Both of them stayed stiff and unyielding. It was strange having someone else right there, feeling their breathing, their weight and body heat only millimetres away. 

The reassurance of someone beside her was almost completely foreign to Jyn. When was the last time she’d slept this close to another person? She vaguely remembered crawling into her parents’ bed during thunderstorms, and she’d shared bedrolls with Maia and other partisans from time to time. But for two years now, since Saw had kicked her out, a cold, cramped, solitary life was all she’d known. The comfort of skin touching skin, a warm body making her feel like she wasn’t alone… it roused a hunger inside that possessed her to inch even closer to him. It was a distraction from the darkness and the restlessness clawing at her from inside her skin.

She brushed her fingertips against his, the slightest possible movement, and he still didn’t move. What would he do if she kept going? They were so close that she could sense the tiny hitch in his breath when she ran her thumb over the base of his palm. Half curious, half daring, she slid her fingers between his, interweaving them in a firmer grip.

His hand moved under hers at last. With a twist, their fingers were suddenly entwined, and her own breath caught thick in her throat. It was just hands, she told herself, but shavit—any kind of gentle touch was unfamiliar enough to feel exotic and enticing.

She brushed her thumb over his bony wrist, daringly pushing up under the fabric of his sleeve where she could feel his pulse throbbing. He was so close that if she turned her head her nose would brush his shoulder. She could tilt her chin up to kiss him—why was she even thinking of that? But she had. She imagined curving her other hand along his cheek to bring his head toward her, pressing her lips against his before he could speak. He’d startle for a second but then kiss her back, their breath mingling, her tongue parting his lips, his hand landing on her hip as he pulled her close...

It was stupid, thinking about kissing at a time like this, completely idiotic. She had no idea if he was thinking of her that way. She wasn’t even really sure she wanted him, beyond a hazy fantasy. But she couldn’t stop thinking about it, with a sudden fierce intensity that confused her. Jyn couldn’t say she was immune to desire; she’d wanted sex before, gone looking for it from time to time, but the associated vulnerability had always been a nearly insurmountable obstacle. 

Right now, she was having trouble remembering why it was a dangerously bad idea. Her heart was pounding, the blood surging roughly through her veins, sizzling and reckless the way she felt before a fight. She rolled over onto her side, leaving her right hand interlaced with his. Her chin pressed into his shoulder, her breath trapped against his shirt, she moved slowly enough to signal her intention as she reached out and deliberately laid her left hand on his leg. She felt him freeze motionless as she slid it up into the crease between his thigh and his groin. Not touching anything vital, not yet, but tucked in snugly enough that her thumb would brush him if he took a deep breath.

He didn't. She could hear a small dry click in his throat as he swallowed. “Why?”

Jyn gave him credit for asking the essential question, instead of something stupid like what she was doing. In return, she gave him the most important reason. “Because I want to.”

“That can’t be the only reason,” he said quietly, and her respect for him went up another notch. 

But she didn’t want to confess that she thought he might be as lonely as she was, or that she was wondering whether loneliness shared between two strangers might be less crushing. That she was almost convinced he could be a more or less decent person—a dangerously tempting belief. Instead she shrugged, knowing he’d feel her shoulder bump against his in the dark. “We’re stuck here for at least another six hours. What else do you want to do? Play I Spy?”

His surprised laugh was soft and low, and it made the heat already building deep in her belly trail fire along her spine.

She could feel him swelling, growing thicker against the side of her hand and she realized that she liked that too. Maybe she still ought to be wary, but instead a crackle of desire raced through her. She trailed her fingers slowly up to the waistband of his pants and carefully worked at the fastenings. The click of snaps coming undone was loud in the quiet space. 

She heard him draw a deep breath in through his nose, but he didn’t do anything, either to encourage or stop her. Jyn decided to take this as tacit permission and kept going, but very gradually. 

For once, she didn’t want to rush. She’d never had much time to explore someone else’s body; she was curious, and he appeared to be willing to indulge her curiosity. The contrast of the silky, warm skin over the hardening erection beneath was fascinating. She pushed her hand farther down, shoving his pants out of the way, and ran her fingertips lightly over his thighs, over his velvety, creased testicles, feeling them shift beneath his skin. She’d never touched anyone’s balls before (only kicked them, when she wanted to put someone on the floor as quickly as possible). It was intriguing, the way they moved…

A deep groan came out of the boy’s chest and the hand interlocked with hers spasmed. “Careful.”

Her hand stilled. “Did that hurt?” 

His rib cage swelled under her cheek as he gulped. “Just—sensitive.”

She took note of that and moved on, trailing her fingers back up along the shaft again. Something slick glazed the tip now and if the harsh, stuttering breath he took when her thumb slipped over it was any indication, it meant the same thing getting wet did for her—this felt good. 

Jyn let go of his hand, finally, and pushed herself up on one elbow, leaning down. Experimenting, she bent her head and licked at the smooth, slippery end of his cock. It didn’t taste strongly of anything, just a little salty. Jyn wasn’t about to try swallowing the whole thing, but she mouthed at the head, kissed along the shaft. The muscles in his stomach jumped, taut and quivering. A soft rustle as his hands clenched in the blanket. Another groan leaked through a half-clenched jaw, his muscles shivered again.

His helpless response made her feel bolder, more assured. She might not know what she was doing, but it was still having an effect on him. She had her hands and her mouth on two of the most vulnerable places of his body. He must trust her at least a little—more than he should. A small trickle of tenderness passed through her, an unfamiliar impulse to make someone else feel good.

Then his hand curved over the nape of her neck and she tensed, anticipating a shove downward. Her arm braced, ready to push back, strike—but his palm just rested there, his thumb brushing her hairline. His voice was ragged, breathy when he spoke. “This isn’t… you know you don’t have to do this.”

Jyn understood why he might think so. Plenty of people used sex as currency, and maybe she’d need to rely on it one day too. But that wasn’t what this was about; she wasn’t doing this for him, it was for her. She wanted to take pleasure from him.

“Damn right I don’t owe you anything.” She lifted her head and turned toward him in the dark. “I’m the one letting you use my hiding place.”

“Right.” His cynical scoffing noise was barely loud enough to hear, even with her head so close to his chest. “So is this what I owe you?”

That thought repulsed her instinctively too. She didn’t want any sort of calculated balance sheet between them. Jyn was letting herself take something she wanted, something inessential for survival, just because she wanted it. That didn’t happen often, and she didn’t want to ruin it by thinking about debts and paying them back.

But she didn’t try to explain any of this; it didn’t seem like the time. All she said was, “I only want to do this if you want to. If you’re interested.” She hesitated, but she needed to know for sure. “Can I keep going?”

She heard his breathing catch slightly. “Yes,” he said, his voice a little lower and rougher than before. “Can I touch you too?”

She whispered, “Yeah,” and felt his palm slide slowly down her back to rest on the strip of bare skin between her pants and where her shirt had slipped up. His fingers drew small circles that sent a tingle in both directions up and down her spine. She ducked her head back down and licked at him again, tasting warm and musky skin, and his thighs tensed under her hands.

“Come up here. Please.” He tugged at her belt. “I can’t reach you down there…”

Jyn wasn’t sure what he meant, but she let him urge her to lie down beside him again. There was no space at all between them now. Her body was sealed against his, her head lying on his arm and her face pressed into his throat, his stubble prickling against her cheek. His arm curled under and around her back, holding her close, and his warm, rough palm covered her hip.

She didn’t stop touching him. She wrapped her hand around his cock that was thickening to fill her grip in a fascinating way, as he took his cue from what she’d done earlier and undid her pants. He slipped his hand between their bodies, pressing his palm against her, and her hips rocked on their own, pushing back against his hand and the hard muscle of his thigh. She whimpered, startling herself, as his other hand slid up from her hip, over her ribs to the underside of her breast, teasing her nipple through the threadbare fabric of her shirt. 

Force, just his hands on her and his breath in her hair were making her ache. He kept rubbing her gently, his touch so light and tentative that she writhed against him. Too gently, dammit. Was he deliberately teasing, or just unsure? 

“What do you want?” he murmured against her forehead. 

Jyn didn't know exactly. Just—_more_. She covered his fingers with her free hand and shoved his hand down where she needed to feel him. Both of them caught their breath as his fingers slipped deeper inside her.

His other hand was still at her breast, his thumb rubbing delicate circles over her nipple. He bent his head and nosed his way past the crystal lying between her breasts to fumble kisses over them. Her skin hummed, buzzing with restless static, and she couldn’t tell whether the tingling thrill that ran through her was from the kyber or her own desire. The wet heat of his mouth surrounding her, pulling at her, somehow closed a circuit between his lips and his hand where he was stroking her, sending sparks racing down to her core.

“Slower,” he gasped against her skin. “Please.”

She realized she was gripping him too hard, distracted by the heat of his mouth. She loosened her fist and stroked him with her thumb, fascinated by the smooth skin sliding under her palm. His sigh was a ghost of hot breath over her chest. Maybe she was doing it wrong; maybe he liked her mouth better. She licked her lips and whispered, “Do you want me to suck you—” 

His hips jerked and a strangled noise escaped the back of his throat. He came, spilling warmth all over her hand and his stomach, and his mouth collided with hers, hot and devouring, in a kiss that was more of a hungry bite at her lips. Before Jyn could figure out whether she liked it, he jerked back. “Shavit, sorry, you didn’t say whether that was okay.”

She could hardly think with his hand still down her pants but she managed to whisper, “It’s okay, we can kiss...” She wiped her own sticky hand off on the blanket behind her and tried not to feel disappointed. Now that he’d gotten off, so much for her hopeful anticipation. 

He kissed her again: slowly and tentatively this time, like he was figuring out a tangled knot. At first the angle wasn’t good, their noses kept getting in the way and it was hard to breathe around his tongue, but then he tilted his head and they slotted together smoothly.

Jyn wanted to stay unaffected. He was no more than an experiment, someone she didn’t know a single thing about and would never see again, someone it was safe to test her fantasies out on. She might be alone, but so was he, and she felt pretty confident she could stop him if he tried to take more than she was willing to offer.

But before she knew it, the kiss became more complicated, turning into something like a conversation: the interplay of their breath, the way he cupped his fingers lightly around the base of her skull, when she caught his bottom lip between her teeth and it made him kiss her harder. It was still kind of clumsy and sloppy but something about it felt intimate—arousing in a different way. And his fingertips were still stroking her inner thigh, his mouth sliding down to her breast again. “Can I touch you?” 

Maybe this wasn’t over yet. 

She fumbled with her own pants, shoving them awkwardly down below her knees. He curled one hand under her knee and pulled her thigh to lie draped across his, opening her legs wider. One of his fingers moved deep inside and brushed a spot that no-one but Jyn had ever touched before. She’d never felt—oh, Force, that was _strong_—he did it again and her body jerked uncontrollably. She moaned and he pressed his lips to hers again, swallowing the noise. 

She arched up against him, wordlessly demanding. She wanted more of his fingers, she wanted him to kiss her and touch her and keep doing them both at the same time. “Don’t stop,” she managed to pant out, fumbling a hand to his neck and pulling his head down to her breast again. His touch was still light, but no longer tentative; now his fingers were moving over her deliberately and with purpose.

“Tell me,” he mumbled against her skin. “Tell me if it feels good—”

Something inside her softened like wax at the sound of those words, of someone thinking about her pleasure. A strange, lazy heaviness spread through her from the places where he was touching her. Her whole body felt hot, fluid, loose, like she was melting into the floor, and her brain was almost as relaxed.

She couldn’t see a thing; the opaque darkness was as palpable as the body of the boy here with her in it. All they were, all they could be to each other, was hands and mouths and skin to clutch at. This was dangerously stupid (or stupidly dangerous) and Jyn hadn’t survived alone since Saw ditched her by being either. But taking the huge risk of trusting this stranger was also making her feel bracingly alive, bringing a knife-sharp edge of agonizing pleasure to every touch, each kiss or brush of his fingers. 

A rolling wave built in her, flooding up from her core through her body and into her throat—she had to tear her mouth away from his to breathe—it was either scream in his ear or bite down on him and Jyn still couldn’t bring herself to make too much noise. She clamped her teeth into the meat of his shoulder to hold the flying fragments of herself together as her nerve endings sizzled up like fuses until the explosion hit. The bright, sharp, almost brutal orgasm made her body go rigid and her fingers dig into his arm so hard it must be painful. 

A long, wavering breath fell out of her and she clung to him as though the wind blasting outside could carry her away. Her fingers curved around his shoulder and felt the indent her bite had left in it; she traced the crescent delicately with one finger. At least she hadn't broken the skin. "Sorry," she whispered. 

His reaction was a low, pleased laugh that somehow made her feel even more. "Are you kidding? Don't be sorry." His hand stroked up her stomach to cup her breast and he kissed her again. This one was slower, sweeter, and she sighed into it as all her tension released, her body uncoiling into a languorous heap. Her hand curled around the back of his neck and held him close to her, kept him where she could taste and touch and inhale him. 

"Let me—" he murmured into her mouth, and pulled away with a suck of her bottom lip. Then he slid down her body, his mouth trailing heat over the slope of her breast, over the hollows of her ribs, moving down to the hard points of her hipbones. But when he kissed the coarse hair just above her cunt she fumbled, trying to push him away, and almost poked him in the eye. 

“Wait, stop.”

He pulled back and rested his chin on her stomach. “You don’t like that?” He sounded confused, and a little embarrassed. 

“No.” She wasn’t lying; Jyn had only experienced that once before and it hadn’t been much to her liking. It was too nerve-wracking, wondering what exactly a person was doing down there, what they could see or taste or… it just wasn’t very sexy. 

But mostly, this was her final test. Would he still listen when she told him to back off in the middle of something? Or would he turn out to be the kind of person she had to convince with force? Her legs tensed. It wasn’t too late; she could deal with whatever his reaction was, from sulkiness to rage, fight him off and kick him out into the storm. 

She heard a soft sigh, but he didn’t say anything. Instead he lifted his head and kissed his way back up her body: a line between her breasts, a dot on the point of her chin before finding her lips again for a brief, hard kiss. “Do you want something else?”

She took a deep breath, hoping her unsteady voice would seem aroused instead of nervous. “I want all of you.” 

“I think you’ve had all of me.” His surprised laugh was hot against her neck. 

Jyn slid her hand down between their bodies again, searching for signs of renewed interest, and yes, he was already halfway hard again. She curled her fingers around him and felt a greedy thrill of satisfaction at the way his hips jerked up into her hand. “I mean I want to fuck you. Have you inside me.”

She could feel his breath stop for a second, and he swallowed hard. She took his hand and pulled it up to the muscle of her tricep where the tell-tale shape of her contraceptive implant could be felt. “I’m covered.”

“So am I,” he said. She knew that; she’d run her fingers over the small flat node under the skin of his shoulder blade. “I mean… are you sure? You’ve done this before, right?”

Jyn bristled, but conceded that was a fair question. “Not quite. But I know what I’m asking.” She threw the question back at him—fair was fair. “What about you?”

“Uh, a few times,” he said. Which probably meant once. “You can think about it…” He swallowed again. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Jyn had been sure since he passed her last test. She didn’t need any more time. And the fact he’d just given her an out was another sign she was probably safe to think she could trust him.

He was still hovering uncertainly above her, propped on his elbows. She slid her hands around his waist and pulled him down, unresisting, into a kiss. He was definitely getting hard again, so part of him was interested. She decided it was a good thing that he wasn’t a total novice. Hopefully he’d know what he was doing, because it wasn’t like Saw had given Jyn any kind of education about sex other than how to avoid its possible consequences. She was still relying mostly on instinct, half-understood stories, and things she’d averted her eyes from when she was younger. The holonet might be full of information about sex, but Jyn had learned a lot of it was garbage.

This was probably her best chance at figuring out exactly why people made such a big deal about this. He was a total stranger, not someone who getting entangled with could cause issues, and he’d shown that he wasn’t the kind of person she had to beware. She should take it.

So far, some of it was good. She liked his mouth drawing kisses from hers, and the helpless noise of pleasure he made when she rolled her hips against him. She drew her fingers slowly up the channel of his spine, scraping her nails lightly along it. His body was warm and solid between her legs as he sketched the lines of her neck and collarbone with his lips—but he was also on top of her, bigger and heavier than her. She felt pinned, too conscious of her potential vulnerability. Her breath began to come shallower, her muscles locked tight. 

He lifted his head from her neck. “No good?”

She twitched her shoulders in a shrug he might be able to feel. 

“How about this...” He rolled off her, to the side and onto his back, pulling her with him until she was draped over top of him. Her crystal dangled between them and bounced against his chest. 

Jyn braced her elbows on his ribs, wishing she could see his face. “You want me on top?”

“I want you anywhere you want to be.” He pulled her down into another kiss, and then his mouth traced a slow, hot line down her throat. Her heart was still pounding, the air driving hard in and out of her lungs. But the fear subsided, desire roaring back in its place, her breath rough and ragged as his hand slid down to her hips and pulled her close. 

She could feel his cock pressing hard against her thigh, so he was still into this, no matter how weird she was being. And she’d gone this far; there was no sense turning back at the last minute. 

She took him in her hand and lifted up just enough to sink down around him, careful and cautious. He was thicker than she would have guessed and she went as slowly as she could, in nervous anticipation of pain that didn't come. 

Fucking turned out to be more complicated than Jyn had assumed. It didn’t hurt, but the sensation of fullness as their hips finally pressed together was intensely strange and overwhelming. And it took a few false starts before she found an angle where she could move on him without making one of them uncomfortable. She wiggled her hips experimentally, trying to figure out if that was the right way to fit together, and he cursed. 

Jyn froze. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” he groaned. “Just didn’t think I could get any harder…” Relieved, she smirked down at him even though he couldn’t see it. She adjusted her hips again, he put his hands at her waist and moved at the same moment—oh, stars, suddenly there was so much _more_ of him pressed deep inside her that she couldn’t suppress a whimper. His fingers trailed up and down her sides, drawing feather-light lines and making her shiver. 

It was very strange, discovering parts of her body she’d never known about before, feeling them filled and rubbed and stroked… strange, but good. But even as her hips fell into a slow, steady rhythm, her sore knee ground against the hard floor every time she moved and the sharp pain was distracting. She couldn’t get lost in her building arousal the way she wanted to. 

He noticed. “Hang on—” He pushed himself up on his hands, coming into a seated position, and Jyn gasped as that shifted his angle inside her in a startling new way. He ran his palms down her legs to her knees and nudged at them. “Put them around my waist.” 

She did, and suddenly she was sitting more or less in his lap, with his thighs underneath her. His head was at the level of her breasts now, and he kissed them leisurely, his rough chin scraping over the tender skin, until his mouth closed on a nipple and she arched backward in response. That drove him deeper and they both groaned. Jyn was achingly sensitive, not just where he was moving inside her, but everywhere. Her whole body was hot, burning, her skin was too tight.

“Holy fu—Force,” he gasped.

She laughed at the euphemism. And then she discovered another new sensation: the way her body clenched and gripped him when she laughed. His hands spasmed, clutching at her shoulders, and he made a low, harsh noise in the back of his throat. So she did it again, on purpose. He gritted out in a barely understandable voice, “Please, don't. That’s going to make me come again before…”

Jyn didn’t really care; she’d had one orgasm, which was more than she’d expected from this experiment anyway. She quickened the pulse of her hips against his, curious just how fast it might happen for him this time. “Considering what we're doing, I think it’s okay if you say _fuck_,” she murmured in his ear. 

He shuddered, twitching inside her, and she realized—“You like that?”

“Yes,” he groaned, pressing his forehead into the crook of her neck. “Your voice… when you…” He swallowed and managed to regain control of his words. “I like your voice.” 

“I like yours, too,” she whispered. Her nails bit into the back of his neck. She wound her fingers into the long hair there and tugged, just a little bit sharp. “So tell me what you want.”

“I just want to feel you all around me.” His voice was hoarse, rough with strain. “I’m gonna… is it okay if I—?” 

She kissed him, swallowing the rest of the question. “Yes, yes.” Her hands stroked thoughtlessly over the lines of his back, delighting in the smooth bare skin and the long lean muscles beneath it. She took a deep breath and told him, “Come inside me.”

Her words made him groan again, and his hips bucked up. He wasn’t kissing her so much as panting against her lips, mouthing at her jaw. His arms locked around her, almost crushingly tight for a moment, and he buried his head in the curve of her neck again as he shuddered against her. She felt more warmth and wetness between her legs. 

Well. If that was all there was to it, Jyn was somewhat unimpressed. 

But apparently, he wasn’t quite done. He lifted his head and kissed her again, his mouth soft and gentle now. He shifted his hips, opening a space so that he could reach between their bodies and touch her. Jyn pulled back, about to tell him not to bother… then a bolt of electric pleasure shot through her from the over-sensitive place his fingers had found. 

She gasped and held tight to his shoulders as heat raced up her spine and through her belly. An embarrassingly needy moan escaped between her teeth and she came again, surprised, clenching down on his half-hard cock. This orgasm was longer, drawn out, it rolled through all the nerve endings in her body and left her limp and trembling, clinging to his shoulders and panting.

She needed a moment, just a second, to catch her breath after that. But he didn’t seem in any hurry to get away either. His arms stayed wrapped around her, if loosely enough that it didn’t feel restrictive, and she could feel his racing pulse gradually slowing down under her cheek. 

Eventually, though, her calves began to cramp; the slight twinge of soreness in her thigh muscles and her core became uncomfortable. Jyn stirred reluctantly, and he helped her lift away as they disentangled their limbs. 

Jyn wasn’t sure what to do now; her previous sexual encounters had mostly ended with her pulling her pants back up and taking off as soon as possible. She ignored him as they tugged their clothes back on and into place, but after that there was nowhere to go, nothing to do but lie down next to him again. In the earlier heady rush of want, this was the part she hadn’t thought through, when she’d be stuck with this stranger until it was safe for both of them to leave.

He didn’t seem to mind, however. He lay down beside her, looped one arm loosely around her waist and pressed his nose to the side of her neck, breathing soft and steady into her hair. Jyn should have felt trapped, but she didn’t. She turned over on her side toward him, placing her own hand lightly on his cheek. 

Her curiosity had roared back to life and though she knew it was pointless, she couldn’t help wondering who this boy was. How had he wound up crossing her path? What was his name? Part of her wished for more light; it would be nice to have a face to remember later… but no, it was better for both of them this way. Safer.

Still, she traced her fingers light and careful over his features, learning what she could. His closed eyes were deep-set, his eyelashes feathery soft under her fingertips. Strong high cheekbones, not much in the way of facial hair—just a faint rasp of stubble at the corners of his smiling mouth and along his jaw. She drew her forefinger up the sharp bridge of his nose and felt a bump. “You’ve broken that,” she murmured.

“You broke yours too,” he said, his muscles moving under her fingertips as he spoke. She remembered him touching her face earlier. “How did it happen?”

Out of habit, Jyn considered lying, but there wasn’t any real reason to now; she didn’t have to impress this boy. “Clocked myself on a pipe while I was crawling through a tunnel,” she told him. She didn’t mention the sense of panic she’d felt while squirming through that cramped space in the dark, blood trickling down the back of her throat and making it even harder to breathe. “You?”

“A security droid broke it.” The pride in his voice didn’t make any sense until he added, “Before I caught him and reprogrammed him.”

Huh. This kid had some smarts then. Not just a good kisser. She smiled to herself in the darkness, imagining a hulking droid following him around like a lothkitten. 

“I wish you could stay,” he breathed against her hair, so softly she could barely hear. 

The saddest part was that Jyn agreed. She pressed her face against his collarbone to muffle her admission. “Me too.”

How did this get so complicated? It wasn’t supposed to be memorable. This stranger should have been nothing more than a means for her to satisfy her curiosity and find out whether what she’d imagined was anything like reality—she’d figured it would be a disappointment, because reality always was. And afterward, with her inflated expectations burst and brought crashing back down to ground, Jyn would have left without hesitating or ever thinking about him again.

Instead, her random encounter had turned out to be gentle. Kind, as far as she could tell. Worst of all—real. She was glad, now, that she didn’t know his name, had never told him hers. That would have made him even harder to forget, the way she was going to have to.

“What if…” She could tell from the tone of his voice that he knew how ridiculous the idea was even as he said it, but he forged on. “You could come with me, maybe. Try working with my people.”

Jyn must have been dazed on post-orgasmic endorphins, because she actually considered it. She did need to get off Gana; if she could hitch a ride, that would be helpful. And then, who knew? If his crew was half-decent, she could stick around. For a little while, anyway. Long enough to try this with him another time or two. She was already thinking about saying yes, if he asked to put his head between her legs again.

But the storm was dying, the wind was falling, and they shouldn't stay here much longer. If he was serious—if she was—she had to figure it out now.

“What is it you do, exactly?” she asked. Jyn had some standards, after all. If he ran with an organization like Crimson Dawn, that would be a dealbreaker. She steered clear of the big syndicates. She didn’t want to get involved in anything that could land her in real trouble, plus they were usually way too cozy with the Empire for her comfort.

She felt him hesitate before speaking, and that sent the first ripple of unease through her. “That depends,” he said slowly. “Some of us run cons. Some of us are thieves. We stick to… certain targets though—” 

“Wait.” Jyn pulled away. A chill spread through her entire body where moments before she’d been warm and satisfied. “You’re Alliance, aren’t you.” 

He didn’t answer right away, which was an answer in itself. “Would that be a problem?” he asked at last.

_Yes_. Her whole body felt cold, frozen, and she couldn’t breathe properly. Force, how stupid could she be?

She still didn’t know why Saw had abandoned her, but with the perspective of a couple of years she’d grudgingly allowed that he must have had some shred of a reason, even if it was magnified by his paranoia. He might have thought she was a traitor (though probably not, or she wouldn’t still be alive), or maybe the Imperials were still hunting for her. Either way, Jyn couldn’t risk being pulled back into the orbit of the Rebellion. She didn't know how closely the Partisans were working with them these days, but then she’d deliberately stayed away from systems where they had a strong presence, not wanting to cross paths with old comrades turned potential enemies.

She had to get out of here, get away, but she couldn’t make him suspicious. 

“I don't know,” she said through a tight throat. “I hadn’t really considered it before.” 

“You don’t have to make your mind up right away. But give it a chance." He sounded utterly sincere, and even knowing it could kill her, she wanted to trust him. “We can get you offplanet, at least.”

“I have to leave now,” she said, trying to sound offhandedly casual. “I need to pick up something I left with a friend in the city. But I can meet you later. Tell me where to find you and I’ll be there.”

“You will?” He sounded eager, honestly pleased. 

Jyn squeezed her burning eyes shut. Maybe she was being prudent, smart enough to save her skin, or maybe she was letting paranoia tear away one last chance at finding a place to belong—someone to belong with. 

But she couldn’t take that risk. 

“Yes,” she said, and the lie sounded convincing because her voice carried all of her hopeless longing for impossible things. 

He kissed her forehead and whispered in her ear, “Berth 27 Resh. We can wait for two hours after the storm.”

He was trusting her with his life, because now she could go to the local garrison and sell him out. She wouldn’t, but he didn’t know that. And again, part of her cried out that she should be there, that she ought to make that leap—but she wasn’t who he thought he was.

Or maybe she was? Jyn didn’t think she was worth enough for the Alliance to set a trap for her, but who knew what Saw had told them about her. They might be looking for her.

Shit, had this whole encounter been a setup? Jyn’s heart began to pound with anxiety. No, she wasn’t deranged enough to believe that. 

But he had just happened to find her hiding place. And been sick. _Or pretended to be_, Saw whispered in her ear. He could have taken a mild dose of almost anything, just enough to give him a slight fever.

Jyn dragged herself out of his arms, stood up and gathered her belongings. She crammed her feet into her boots and hastily checked her lumpy pack. Everything was still there. She had to go. If she didn’t get out of here right now, she’d lose it and tell him everything out of some misguided sense of guilt.

Her crystal was a white-hot point of fire against her skin again, so hot she winced and pulled it away from her skin, feeling it scorch her fingers even though she knew it wouldn’t leave a mark.

Her chance-met Rebel had gotten to his feet as well and was pulling on his shirt. As she put her hand on the hatch button, he touched her wrist. “Wait a second—”

She turned around before he could say anything else, lifted her head and kissed him for the last time, letting herself soften and lean into his tall frame. He slid his arms around her waist and pulled her close; his mouth was warm and soft and tempting her to give in, to sigh against his lips and stay...

Jyn pulled away and shoved the hatch open. It moved jerkily over blown-in sand; the wind had died and the air outside was breathable, but still dark and fogged with dust. She pulled her scarf up over her mouth and her goggles down over her eyes.

“I’ll see you,” she lied, and fled. She didn’t look back at him, not wanting to see his face in better light. She told herself that would make it easier to forget.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments always welcome!


End file.
